I haven’t cried in a while. I thought my tears were done. Until today. I can’t stop thinking of you today.

I miss our green smoothies.
I miss being woken up all hours of the day and night as the medical staff came to give you more meds… it was when we still had hope.

I miss being the one tough enough to push you to do things you didn’t want to do: take a walk, take a few more sips of your smoothie (your sips were never sips… you chugged like a champ! You were always an overachiever. I guess that’s where I got it:)

I miss your silliness.
I miss your calmness.
I miss your unwavering faith.
I miss your hope.

I miss your love for your grandsons. I miss you telling me how beautiful they are.
I miss seeing your name pop up on every single social media post.
I miss your encouragement and your faith in me.

We had so little time together at the end. After I had put away all my pettiness and finally learned to love and be loved by you. So little time. But it is the very gift that I’m the most thankful for.

Father God, you have been so merciful to me. So merciful. Thank you for the time you gave us. The time to make things right.

Now I daydream of heavenly perfection. How must you look? How must you feel? Every flaw and every fear, gone. Every hurt and every failure, erased. I bet it’s glorious.

See you again soon pop. 💝