Amazing…. absolutely amazing… About this time last year I was in a place of confusion, despair, and frustration. I had a life that didn’t seem to belong to me and for the first time, realized that I had spent all my energy being the person that everyone else wanted me to be, and not who I really was MEANT to be… or even desired to be for that matter! I knew it was time for a real change, but I had no idea what that really meant. I did know, however, that happiness and wholeness was out there somewhere and I was very determined to find it!

I started 2008 with an “emotional detox” in order to cleanse myself from the other voices in my life. This meant 30 days of NO TV, NO Internet, and NO dating. I forced myself to be alone with my thoughts and my sorrows. Little did I know this was the beginning of the transformation that God had in store for me.

Since all I could do was read, I chose “Eat, Love, Pray” by Elizabeth Gilbert to begin my journey. I heard it was a phenomenal book and boy were they right! I also joined my friend’s non-denominational church called Celebration. Coming from a Catholic foundation, this was a HUGE change, but that is exactly what I wanted. I needed to hear from God because until then all I knew was memorized prayer and traditions. God seemed so far away! I needed to really HEAR Him and FEEL Him in my soul! By the third Sunday at my new church, I had completely broken down in tears before service even started… my heart had opened up and I was in a place of total surrender. I participated in a 7-day fast eating only fruits and veges and a gallon of water a day (Daniel fast… Completely cleaned my system and renewed my mind and body… lemme tell ya)! This is when it happened… my breakthrough… the vision from God for my life… the complete peace I was searching for! In an instant (in between sobs) I felt everything just melt away… a feeling I can only describe as being filled with the Holy Spirit.

Ashlee, Mary & Amber

From that moment until this very day, my life has been overflowing with love, faith, and absolute miracles! I have stepped off the roller coaster ride and have found the steady path that He has chosen for me. I realized that the security I was searching for was not in financial stability, the right job, or a perfect man… it was with HIM! I had finally let myself go enough to discover the peace, happiness and fulfillment that I had been searching for all of my life! Without even trying, I had truly been changed from the inside out! Yes, I still make mistakes, yes I still have a tiny “shopping” problem (for others actually), and yes I have sad or stressful moments, but there is nothing like knowing that all I have to do is have just a tiny ounce of faith that He is leading me in the right direction… especially through the pain. I have learned that it is usually in the most difficult times, the most broken moments, when we are weak enough to allow Him to take over and give us strength. Most of the time we are wanting to do it all on our own and then spend our entire lives wondering why we can’t just get it right! I have decided to challenge the ways of the world and truly live for Him. Now my church is my second home, I start and end my days reading His word (which by the way I never realized how much wisdom was in the Bible! It’s like a how-to book for life! Seriously! The words on those pages seem to just jump out and scream “DUH… this is what I’ve been trying to tell you! This is how you find love and happiness! It’s not that hard if you would just take the time to listen!”)

This year I have been re-baptized, gone on a mission trip to Costa Rica, become a middle school youth leader, began traveling around the country with a Christian teen girl conference called the Revolve Tour, and the most exciting news of all, God gave me the vision to start a Christian teen publication! And so began my journey to walk out this calling.

CultureShock Magazine was initially born, or should I say evolved, from an idea to start a community newsletter in order to bring unity, values, and safety to our city. Unity by conducting small groups and clubs within specific communities that focused on a particular topic or “hobby;” Values by incorporating a positive, encouraging, & loving environment in each group meeting; Safety by promoting friendships and communication between neighbors. As the business idea developed, I realized that the biblical principals that I wanted to incorporate would probably not be received as well as I would have hoped… ultimately I hit a wall and began to pray about a better direction. Then one day it hit me… why not start with a younger generation?? I mean, most teens are still searching for answers and probably haven’t experienced as many negative encounters with God (and if they have, it is still early enough in their lives where the healing may be a bit easier and the pain has not had too much time to bury itself deep in their subconscious). So that part was settled… I would target teenagers. This worked out great because I was going to start serving at church as a middle school leader! Ok, so then I thought, how will I get the community newsletters in the hands of teens?? DUH!! My college degree is in English with a focus in magazine writing, not to mention that myself and 2 others began Karma and Industry Magazine in Orlando, Florida. What about a teen magazine?!?! Why did I not think of that before?? That would be the obvious choice for me… maybe that’s why it was so hard for me to get it! Always taking the difficult route and over-thinking every detail of my life! So there it was… THE ANSWER! THEE call from God for my life. I felt it in my bones and to the tips of my fingers and the tips of my toes… THIS was IT! Finally!! And it only took 30 years! Ironically, a year later (while watching Pastor Stovall’s interview on TBN January 6,09 to be exact) I got the most amazing realization… didn’t Jesus start his ministry at age 30? Wow…. now THAT is confirmation!

Hilary, Pastor Stovall & Mary – First to be baptized on the new land!